The Story-Chapter Three

Chapter Three

Elsie was doing to chicken dance.
   Anne fell over herself in shock, and Elsie disappeared into the green, dark forest. Even with her bright dungarees, Anne could not find her. She would need help. Sighing, she pulled herself up and ran to the Thompson house.
   She was greeted by laughter and a shriveled up mound.
   Lynn, Granny, Colm and Josephine's cousin's friend's cousin's brother's friend's sister's friend's uncle's nephew's daughter's grand-aunt's daughter's friend's aunt's brother's niece's nephew's friend's aunt's Barney's mother's nephew's girlfriend were all out on decking chair drinking champagne.
   Suddenly, a little, fluffly, black and white, miniscule, perky-eared, chiwawa-pomeranian-poodle dog jumped up on the table.
   Lynn stared at it in amazement. 'Binky?' She cried and hugged the dog. Lynn spotted Anne and ran over to her. 'This is Binky! Isn't he the cutest? Where's Elsie? I'll have to explain the situation to her in private with everyone there!'
  'Lynn, Elsie ran off! I think she's looking for Binky!' Anne told her.
   Lynn was speechless. 'But-But-But-' She stammered. She went on like that for an hour. An hour of buts later she said 'But you couldn't have missed her atrocious clothing!'
   Anne sighed. 'The forest was too dense.'
   Lynn shrugged and walked to join her companions in a champagne drinking contest. Anne gaped at her for a moment. Did she not care for her children at all?
   As if answering her question, Lynn started hugging Charlie. It was apparent that she only cared for one child.
   Anne decided she would find Elsie, since no one else would. Determined, she hurried into the forest, searching and searching until…
   Then she saw it; a flash of cheap denim between two trees. And then... something wailed. Loudly.
   Anne sneaked up slowly until she met the hairy neck of Elsie, who was sitting behind a tree. She quickly took out her medication, and decided it was probably best she over dosed her.
   Elsie made low, grunting voices. Anne grinded her teeth, and with all her force stabbed the sharp needle into Elsie's neck. Well, who she taught was Elsie.
   A loud grunt echoed through the forest, and a gorilla toppled onto Anne's knee. It was dead.
   While the reader might be curious as to why medicine that would simply knock out a teenage girl could kill a gorilla, Anne had other thing on her mind.
   'But,' she said in astonishment, 'There's no gorillas in Ireland!'
   Out of nowhere, Elsie jumped out from behind a tree. She was growling madly, and tears were streaming down her muddy cheeks. 'You Murderer!' she shrieked, 'How, how could you! That gorilla had a life! And you just took it away! You cruel, cruel, MONSTER!'
   This was followed by a loud chorus of curses.
   Anne slowly stood up, 'Yeah, but that doesn't make sense,' she stuttered, 'There are no gorillas in Ireland!'
   'That's what you thought,' wailed Elsie, 'You know that Cadbury add? The one with the precious, gifted gorilla playing the drums? That, brilliant, talented-'
   'Okay, I get it you freaky tree-hugger,' interrupted Anne, 'But that gorilla wasn't real. He couldn't have been!'
   Elsie cried, 'He was!'
   'He was a costume!'
   'No he wasn't! He had a life, and…'

   A few hours later…

   Elsie was grunting in her sleep and shouting out Binky's name. Anne was dragging her back to the house. She'd had to drug her to stop her ranting, and boy, was she heavy. Finally, Anne saw a break in the trees.
   When she got back to the house, her mother reached down to hug her daughter, but Elsie, awakening, ducked through her legs and ran into the newly decorated house. (After Anne went away to look for Elsie, builders came in to rebuild and refurbish the house).
   Anne stared after Elsie from the garden seating. 'Well, Lynn,' Anne started. 'There's your daughter.'
   Lynn's face fell. 'I was hoping she would be gone a bit longer, Elsie's no fun at all. All she drinks is water and liquidized tofu-she can only eat liquidized things. At least Charlie drank…'
   Elsie appeared again at the front door and made her way down beside Colm and his gay friend.
   Colm's friend was tall, and pale. He had short black hair, blue eyes and a nose the size of Russia. He was hideous.
   Colm's friend was… intrigued by Elsie. He edged over slowly and started trying to crack jokes. 'Did you hear about the movie Constipated?'
   Elsie looked away and sighed, 'No, I haven't.'
   Colm's friend grinned, 'It hasn't come out yet.' There was a long silence. Eventually, Colm's friend added, 'Don't you get it? Constipated… hasn't come out?'
   Elsie's face remained bored.
   'Well,' he struggled, 'My names Gary. It's nice to meet you.' Gary stuck his hand out and Elsie tried not to puke when she took his hand. Elsie presumed he was going to shake it but instead he brought it to his lips and started gnawing on her fingernails. Elsie screamed.
   Elsie removed her hand and looked down at her fingernails. They had disappeared-Gary had bitten them all off.
   She twisted her face when she looked at him.
   'Fingernails are very good for digestion didn't you know that?' Colm said looking up at Gary with admiration. Gary looked down at Colm and was a little bit freaked out by him.
   Anne sat down and took a sip of water and looked over at them both with a sick glance.
   Suddenly, Binky ran up to Elsie and bit her leg. Then he backed off and grinned up at her. On Elsie's leg there were two huge, purple puncture marks where Binky had bit her. She looked down at them and Binky licked her leg. When Elsie looked down her leg had a huge, long piece of hair coming out of the puncture marks.
   'Whooooooooaaaaaa, Elsie!' Gary said. 'You have a beard on your leg.'
   Colm screamed shrilly and gasped, 'You're so right Gary! They are so gross and they're like huge beards on her leg…..' Colm sighed as he looked dreamily up at Gary.
   'Binky!!!' Elsie squealed, running over to hug him. 'I missed you so, so, so, so, so, so,' she took a breath, 'so, so, so, so, so much!!! I went through a depression for you!' Elsie looked down at Binky and noticed that he had gone limp in her arms.
   'You'll hug him to death,' called her mother.
   Elsie looked down at her favourite dog in the whole world. His chest had stopped rising up and down. 'Everyone I love dies!!!' she moaned.
  Suddenly her dog started panting and wagging his tail in a mocking way. 'You-' Elsie screamed, looking murderous. Binky choked a barking laugh and the whole group chuckled. Elsie plopped down on the grass and held her head in her hands. Binky sniffed at her and she giggled.
   Elsie's leg beards flowed in the wind along with her long, wavy brown hair and Binky stopped trying to get her attention. Instead he tried to catch onto her leg beards, which had grown really long.
   The pair turned around and ran into Gary. Elsie backed away slowly.
   'I'm sorry I ate all your nails, but they tasted so nice I couldn't stop eating them!' Gary said.
   Elsie started moving back but Gary advanced as she did. Elsie stepped back and hit a tree. She was trapped by the outskirts of the forest.
   'Get away you freak!' she cried, and was going to push him back but he caught her hands and looked hungrily down at her fingernails. She then kneed him in the privates and she ran back to the garden. Gary never came back.
   Colm looked sad and hung his head down. Anne was playing with Binky who never once bit her. His fur was dirty and long. Elsie picked him up and he snuggled into her chest.
   'Come here!' Lynn shouted as she came out with dog food, which she usually had a stock of in case Elsie was having one of her episodes.
    Jealous, Elsie threw Binky over to Colm and ran forward. Lynn held it out of her reach and she whined. As Binky came over he jumped into the bowl and started eating it. Elsie became frustrated and tried to push Binky out of the bowl but he bit her face. Elsie now had two puncture marks on her chin, and hair started growing. In two minutes, Elsie had grown a long beard like Dumbledore's.
   Lynn screamed. 'Elsie, that's horrible! Now you're more ugly then that Dûfflétoñ girl! Come on, we'll have to bring you to the hospital!'
   Elsie whimpered, scared. She didn't like hospitals. They had needles. She slowly got up and followed her mother to the car. She had a feeling she wouldn't come back the same.
   Binky licked his bowl and followed her hesitantly. Elsie kneeled down in front of him, stroking his filthy mane. 'I'm sorry Binks, but, but you can't come. I hate to be separated too after the short time we've been together again but…' she stood up and turned back to the car.
   Anne started singing, 'Together again, together again, we're back together again. With each new day, we shout 'Hooray!' it's good to be together again! Well everyone but Elsie. She'll probably die.'
    Anne carried on singing and Elsie just whined to herself.
   'Lynn can I open the car window?' Anne asked exuberantly.
   'Yeah sure, just make sure Elsie has a seatbelt on.' The roof doubled back.
   'Oh my GOD!' cried Elsie. 'We have a convertible!'
   Lynn shook her head and sighed, stroking the leather seats. 'Alas, no, it's Granny's.'
   'How is Granny able to afford this? Or drive it?'
   Lynn kept on driving until she said 'Well, during her mid-life crisis… she was a little bit delusional. She thought she was a teenager in one of those Hollywood movies, and she wanted a convertible so she paid for this with your college money.'
   Elsie's eye's widened in confusion. 'How am I going to go to college with no money?'
  Lynn smiled. 'Not to worry, you're forgetting that all your brothers died! You can have their college money.'
   Elsie sighed. 'What about Grandad's funeral?'
   Lynn gasped. 'I forgot about that! All the money of your brothers will be needed for that! Well, I guess you won't go to college!'
   Elsie frowned and lay back in her seat. She would try to get some rest before the hospital. It was a long journey.
   Anne, Charlie, Granny and Colm were squished into the back. They were talking about the recession.
   'I think it's funny,' said Charlie.
  'It's a very serious business, dear,' whispered Granny to Charlie.
   Colm rolled his eyes and muttered 'It'll be over soon.'
   'Yeah, but…' Anne started.
   Elsie started awake. Nobody was actually talking. There was complete silence. Elsie shook her head in confusion and took a bon-bon out of the compartment.